Public-Domain Stories on Screen

A vengeful captain drafts a crew into his private war against a specific sperm whale with a grudge.

One war, ten years lost at sea, and several gods with grudges.

A man insists he's sane. This does not go well.

A mother hunts for rich sons-in-law while her daughter enjoys hating the man she is destined to marry.

A bored girl follows a rabbit into a world where eating cake changes your height and logic is optional.

A giant king crosses a sea on foot while his sister’s wedding feast is ruined by a very angry brother.

A foundling spends two generations dismantling two families to avenge a broken heart and a lost social standing.

An orphan girl inherits a castle and a guardian who treats hospitality like a hostage negotiation.

A sorcerer maroons his enemies on an island. Then things get complicated.

A solicitor visits a client in the mountains, only to find the client has teeth.

An elderly farming duo requests an orphan boy for help; the orphanage sends an imaginative girl instead.

An ancestral curse requires blood to drink, but the Pyncheons settle for selling ginger-beer instead.

A student builds a giant from old parts, abandons it, and spends the rest of his life being stalked by it.

A celebrated monk breaks every vow for a demon in disguise, leading to a family reunion in the catacombs.

A scholar finds a coded note in an old book and decides the only logical response is jumping into a volcano.

A girl gets invited to an old manor and promptly assumes everyone is a serial killer.

Knights errant, runaway sparrow-hawks, and swords for bridges: the standard operating procedure for Arthur's table.

A miser learns he is the villain of his own life after a series of supernatural home invasions.

A ship's surgeon visits a land of six-inch politicians and a kingdom of giants who treat him like a doll.

A boy finds a map, a squire hires a mutinous crew, and a parrot screams for pieces of eight.

A weary traveler promises the absolute truth about moon-men, space-spiders, and living inside a whale, then admits he is lying.

A doctor creates a chemical shortcut to immorality and finds the commute is impossible to stop.

Dionysus goes to the Underworld to rescue a poet, but the candidates won't stop bickering.

A rogue captain drives a submarine around the world; his guests want off.

A stranger moves in, refuses to leave, and treats the host like a midnight buffet.

A young socialite stays perpetually beautiful while his oil portrait pays for his sins in wrinkles and rot.

An American ambulance officer falls for a nurse while the world falls apart.

A man wagers his fortune on a clock, then realizes he miscounted the calendar.

A shipwrecked man spends three decades building a personal kingdom out of goatskin, salvaged planks, and solitary prayer.

An Irish orphan wanders India as a Buddhist disciple while moonlighting for the British Secret Service during the Great Game.

A paladin goes mad, a hippogriff visits the moon, and two lovers fight fate to start an Italian dynasty.

A crew of specialists hunts an elusive creature with thimbles, forks, railway shares, and a very specific fear of Boojums.

The men won't stop fighting, so the women stop everything else. War loses its supply line.

A scholar spends his life writing a Hebrew dictionary, but history remembers his side-hustle about a sleigh.

Four runaways, a weaver with donkey ears, and the most chaotic gardening accident in history.

A mountain holds a face, a man builds a house of marble, and time never stops turning.

A Flea competes for a princess’s hand, a tree regrets growing up, and two rogues weave a suit of nothing.

A giant helmet crushes the heir, and the lord decides the best solution is marrying the fiancée.

An archdeacon, a bellringer, and a poet obsess over a dancer while the cathedral watches a city outgrow its walls.

A wife realizes her husband loves her position in his life more than her.

A young philosopher argues the Greeks were only beautiful because they were profoundly miserable.

A king steals a hero’s girl, a hero sulks in his tent, and Troy pays the price in blood.

A village girl loses her innocence to a liar and her reputation to everyone else.

A father mandates his younger daughter stays single until her older sister finds a husband.

Two couples are tricked into love while a villain ruins a wedding with a lie.

A Portuguese explorer braves unmapped oceans, jealous gods, and hostile merchants to trade pepper for national glory.

A prince brings a rose, a princess brings a pea, and everyone is vaguely dissatisfied.

An alphabet starts with a pie, a hen lays eggs for gentlemen, and a knave regrets his pastry theft.

A king blows feathers into the wind to pick an heir while a soldier negotiates a living bear-skin suit.

A boy pulls a sword from a stone, founds an elite fellowship, and watches it crumble through betrayal and magic.

Two Acadian lovers are separated by a mass deportation and spend a lifetime crossing a continent to find each other.

A grumpy Welsh squire leads his eccentric relatives across Britain while their new footman accidentally reveals his bare backside.

A mourning prince meets his father's ghost, feigns madness, and delays a murder until almost everyone is dead.

A boy flies into a nursery, steals three siblings, and refuses to apologize for it.

A bankrupt farmer hopes to talk his way out of debt, but learns bad arguments instead.

Two identical boys swap clothes, forcing a Prince into the slums and a pauper onto the English throne.

An orphan gets a fortune from a secret source, only to find his new status is a very expensive trap.

Before Netflix, medieval towns turned the Bible into local theater for the public to enjoy.

A nineteenth-century engineer wakes up in Camelot and attempts to outpace sixth-century magic with gunpowder and electric current.

Thebes is dying of plague, and King Oedipus hunts the murderer to end it.

A monster terrorizes a royal mead-hall for twelve years; a visitor from across the sea decides to fix it.

A poet walks through Hell, Purgatory, and Heaven; he sees exactly what you might expect.

Siegfried fights dragons, wins a queen, and ruins everything for his in-laws.

A girl breaks into a family home for lunch. The homeowners are not amused.

A King believes he is God's deputy until his cousin brings a real army.

You arrive like water and leave like wind. Might as well order a drink first.

A plague ravages Florence, so ten friends hide in a villa to gossip professionally.

A man is betrayed on his wedding day and spends fourteen years deciding who pays.

Two princes crash-land in a pastoral utopia, adopt disguises, and accidentally make both the King and Queen fall in love with them.

Two sisters navigate romance. One does it with logic, the other with a dramatic fainting spell.

A Victorian doctor examines how John Milton built a universe using both ancient myths and the latest telescope discoveries.

Two pairs of identical twins arrive in the same city, causing immediate legal, marital, and metaphysical chaos for everyone involved.

A statesman and his friend debate whether virtue can actually outrun a really bad week.

A man takes in a holy beggar. The beggar immediately starts asking for his wife.

A philosopher lists how cities fall, how they thrive, and why citizens shouldn't sing the wrong songs.

An English soldier visits Scotland for a quiet holiday and accidentally joins a revolution to restore a king.

Danish princes, Venetian creditors, and shipwrecked sorcerers inhabit this definitive collection of early modern drama and verse.

A horse recounts his life of service, stable politics, and why humans should definitely avoid tight reins.

A girl born in a debtors' prison finds a fortune, while a man seeking the truth finds himself in her cell.

A traveling salesman transforms into a giant insect, and his family is mostly just annoyed by his poor work attendance.

A family tree grows around a divine sword, but its branches eventually buckle under the weight of cursed dragon treasure.

A farmer explains the weather, gods fight for their lives, and the missing chapters of the Trojan War finally appear.

A marriage ends in scandal while a farmer finds meaning in his cabbage patch.

Socrates builds a city out of logic to find justice, then bans the poets and chains the citizens to shadows.

A country boy arrives in Paris, insults three legends, and suddenly everyone is fighting for the Queen.

A philosopher describes a perfect prehistoric Athens and the wealthy island empire that collapsed after losing its divine spark.

A skeletal cup-bearer pours a final drink for the King while the Rich Man discovers his gold cannot bribe the grave.

He abandons his life for a woman who loves luxury more than poverty, and she knows it.

A tutor and his aristocratic student exchange high-minded letters until a violent father and a rational husband intervene.

A catalog of Greek thinkers, covering their world-changing theories, their embarrassing habits, and the exact lists of every book they wrote.

The wolf is hungry, the fox is lying, and the ant is busy judging everyone.

A giant born from an ear grows up to drink, fight, and philosophize.

A courtier decodes the secrets of power, the anatomy of anger, and the hidden political manuals buried inside ancient Greek myths.

Gods pursue nymphs, heroes sail for gold, and humans turn into trees, birds, or stars at the slightest divine whim.

A princess survives a murder plot, a trunk-based home invasion, and twenty years of family kidnapping in ancient Britain.

A farmer's wife brandishes a carving knife while pigs go to market and men debate the merits of getting out of bed.

A peasant girl saves the French crown, then tries to survive being a holy icon.

A Scottish farmer writes his way from the stable to the salon, roasting hypocrites and apologizing to field mice along the way.

One king, a round table, and a collection of knights who mostly just hit each other.

The heir disappears on Christmas Eve, leaving behind a baffled town and a permanently unwritten conclusion.

The world ends, the Judge arrives, and the wicked try — and fail — to talk their way out of hellfire.

A student kills a pawnbroker to prove he is a superman, then discovers he lacks the stomach for the aftermath.

A man seeks the divine while chasing every distraction in North Africa.

A Parisian diamond merchant returns to a bleak English wasteland, marries the wrong woman, and loses his eyesight to books.

A family curse involving a glowing giant dog forces a detective to leave London for the foggy Devon moors.

A stranded traveler is mistaken for a government inspector, so he lets the corrupt local officials pay his bills.

A king returns from war to a murderous wife, starting a cycle of family killings that only a trial can end.

A girl chases a rabbit, ignores the laws of arithmetic, and develops a very inconvenient neck.

A sensitive traveler packs six shirts and zero plans, preferring emotional encounters with strangers to seeing the actual sights.

An amateur sleuth scans the Odyssey for clues that Homer was actually a woman.

A young king leaves his wild past behind to invade France, manage a siege, and woo a princess.

A gentleman snips a curl at a party, sparking a social war of legendary, tiny proportions.

Socrates faces his executioner, declares he has no desire for a long, senile life, and walks away.

Two men leave Athens to start a city in the clouds. Birds take over.

One ambitious Duke calculates the math of murder to clear his path to the throne.

A king returns from ten years of war to find his welcome mat is a death trap.

A new soldier joins the army expecting glory. He gets mud, shells, and a sudden desire to run.

A king discovers his parentage, a sister breaks the law, and gods never stop watching.

An traveler visits an island where gold is for chamber pots and war is unpopular.

Three Englishmen attempt to solve the mysteries of the Nile by floating across the continent in a double-walled hydrogen balloon.

Senators fret over a crown, commit a public stabbing, and discover that killing a man is easier than killing his ghost.

An idealistic young woman marries a dry clergyman, and the town collectively wonders why she bothered.

A king fears a one-sandaled man, so he sends fifty heroes on a boat toward a very dangerous sheepskin.

A survivor flees a burning city, survives a goddess's grudge, and finally finds a place to land.

Two teenagers meet at a party, marry by dawn, and die by Thursday.

A traveler flies to the moon, only to find the locals have some very pointed questions about him.

Jason leaves his wife for a princess, failing to anticipate her rather extreme plan for alimony.

An orphan girl takes a job, meets a brooding man, and discovers a problem in the attic.

A boy flees his drunk father, finds an enslaved man, and descends the Mississippi toward freedom.

A king spends seven years conquering Spain, but his rear guard loses everything in an afternoon.

A boy wants to avoid school, witness his own funeral, and find treasure without doing any actual chores.

A rowdy group of pilgrims trades stories on a road trip, followed by a parliament of birds and Trojan heartbreak.

One man leaves his city for a better one, ignoring the arrows fired at his back.

Troy has fallen, its king is dead, and the survivors are being sorted like inventory.

A merchant officer jumps from a sinking ship; he spends the rest of his life explaining why.

Two poets swap their fancy vocabulary for plain talk and find the world is suddenly weirder.

Rhetoric is just a shortcut to popularity. Socrates prefers the hard truth, regardless of the consequences.

A guide to the good life that assumes you are not a stone.

A lender demands a pound of flesh. The debtor finds a very messy loophole.

A girl runs away in man's clothes. Her father is currently living in a tree.

A woman wears a letter for her sins, while the father keeps his own secret.

Are names nature’s own labels, or just a noise we decided meant something?

A snub-nosed philosopher helps a brilliant student try, and fail, to define knowledge before heading to his own trial.

A professor critiques an entire century of literature and finds the best things are everywhere.

A man leaves his family to find salvation, carrying a backpack that turns out to be his own sins.

A puppet wants to be a real boy, but keeps getting distracted by swindling foxes.

An ex-slave explains why your reputation, your property, and your body are none of your business.

A prehistoric king dreams of falling stars while a wild satyr learns that beer and bread are the keys to civilization.

A gentleman proposes that Ireland’s starving poor sell their year-old infants to the rich as a nutritious, high-end meat source.

The Eleatic Stranger treats a city like a flock of sheep, and it gets surprisingly technical.

A Trojan prince falls for a traitor’s daughter while legendary heroes bicker in the mud over a seven-year stalemate.

A god shows up in Thebes to start a cult. The King says no.

A piper charts the shift from sun-drenched meadows to the soot-stained streets of a cynical, adult London.

A man wakes Socrates at dawn to meet a celebrity teacher. Socrates demands receipts.

A shipwrecked crew finds a hidden island where the locals have solved everything, including physics.

The Danish king has a pest problem in his living room, and a Geat offers to handle it.

A man follows his idol around London for twenty years taking notes. The idol survives.

A king suspects his queen of cheating. He gets it spectacularly, disastrously, and aggressively wrong.

Ten stories where the woods are dangerous, the cats are devious, and magic rarely simplifies anything.

A general insults the public, gets fired, and decides to burn his hometown to the ground.

A woman disguises herself as a man, and then everyone falls in love with the wrong person.

A poet tries to talk a handsome friend into fatherhood before pivoting to professional jealousy and a very messy breakup.

A man who lived through the Roman Empire offers advice on how not to be a disaster.

A general sacrifices a prisoner's son. The queen decides this requires several dozen sequels.

A man loses his career and his freedom. Philosophy shows up to explain why he shouldn't care.

A sour orphan finds a locked garden; she decides she and her invalid cousin are not staying sick.

Nineteen years for a loaf of bread; a lifetime spent running from the law.

Earth is watched by creatures with vast, cool intellects. They are not interested in missionary work.

Stolen from a sunny estate, a heavy-muscled dog learns to trade his collar for the kill-or-be-killed logic of the Arctic.

A tax collector turned moralist sketches the 17th-century French court with enough sharp detail to make everyone recognize their neighbor.

A courtesan loses her jewelry, a Brahman loses his wealth, and a small clay toy becomes the pivot for a revolution.

The poet tells you how to manage bees, trees, and cows. Your soil does the rest.

King Brutus leaves his sons a divided nation, a Scythian invader, and a secret affair that drowns the royal family.

A personified Folly argues that life is a theater where everyone is wearing the wrong costume for the right reasons.

A monk argues that your biggest problem is yourself and offers a manual for vanishing into the Divine.

A disgraced angel launches a spite-driven insurgency against Heaven, targeting a new couple in a garden to settle the score.

A foundling loves a girl, makes constant mistakes, and manages to stumble into success.

A Scythian shepherd trades his crook for a crown, cages the Turkish Emperor, and redefines the limits of human ambition.

Athens is small, everyone is related, and every young man is one clever servant away from a wedding.

Human existence requires a steady intake of delusion, bad decisions, and the occasional bribe to avoid total collapse.

A mountain-dwelling prophet descends to announce that God is dead and humans are merely a bridge to something better.

An aristocrat returns to Paris during the Terror, a vengeful knitter tracks his lineage, and a lookalike settles a debt.

A career criminal writes his autobiography to warn you against the very lifestyle he clearly enjoyed.

Helena cures the King, marries the Count, and then has to deal with his fleeing.

A general marries for love, but his own lieutenant decides to ruin everything for sport.

A teacher keeps talking, his students keep asking, and the local government keeps ignoring the advice.

Eight centuries of English writing distilled into eight ages, from medieval allegories to the rise of the Victorian novel.

A Duke goes undercover to watch his replacement enforce a sex ban, only for the new guy to demand a bribe.

A king must carry a talkative goblin across a cemetery without speaking, or risk his head literally exploding.

A retired general lists every time his old teacher was actually a useful, law-abiding, and deeply pious citizen.

A frog gets pelted with stones and points out the obvious to the neighborhood children.

An oracle delivers a horrific prophecy, a king tries to outrun it, and his children inherit the resulting rubble.

A Spanish teenager survives shipwrecks, harems, and Russian sieges while his narrator constantly stops to complain about other poets.

A grieving scholar tries to talk logic to a bird that only knows one extremely discouraging word.

A young man steps through his bedroom door into a forest where trees hunt, shadows cling, and marble breathes.

A wealthy youth tries to rule Athens, but Socrates won't let him leave the house without defining justice first.

A Roman poet explains that since you are just a temporary collection of atoms, you can finally stop fearing death.

A general hears he will be king. His wife suggests he skip the waiting.

A Pythagorean theorist explains how the Creator used geometry, fire, and a single soul to build the physical world.

A scholar trades his eternal soul for twenty-four years of magic, petty pranks, and a very stressed demon servant.

A philosopher drinks hemlock, but not before checking the math on his own soul.

A king divides his land by how much his daughters praise him. It goes badly.

A blind poet dictates the history of the universe, the rebellion of Hell, and a very expensive piece of fruit.

Bored Civil War veterans decide the only logical use for their giant surplus cannons is to shoot three men at the moon.

Ovid treats seduction like a chariot race, offering a technical guide to hunting, catching, and keeping a lover in Rome.

A general chooses the Queen of Egypt over the Roman Empire. Rome disagrees.

A scholar trades his soul for unlimited knowledge, and the devil starts micromanaging his dating life.

A prince turns a classroom of peers into a global superpower, one tactical decision at a time.

A Viking's armor, a blacksmith's anvil, and a youth on a frozen mountain define a world where endurance is the ultimate virtue.

A sailor kills a bird, ghosts haunt the ship, and a wedding guest loses his night.

Five aristocratic families attend high-society parties in Saint Petersburg while Napoleon marches a massive army toward their front doors.

A farmer writes poetry about mice and theology. The Church is not amused.

Seven men agree to praise love at a dinner party; nobody stops talking until sunrise.

A prince raised in a cell is released to rule, just to see if he's actually sane.

An Athenian nobleman bankrupted by bad hospitality decides humanity is the problem.

A man asks if virtue can be taught; he is immediately trapped in a logic maze.

A wealthy retiree tours England to document observations, but his servant keeps saving his life.

A landscape of dry stone, empty bottles, and dead sailors where the rain won't fall and the voices won't stop.

Two actors collect their friend's work. It becomes the bedrock of English literature.

A bearded man identifies with everything in America, from the Brooklyn ferry to the grass growing over the dead.

A London citizen records a city’s disintegration as 1665’s plague empties the streets of the living.

A bishop dies, a chaplain overreaches, and the cathedral close descends into polite, high-stakes misery.

A man is on trial for his life and decides the best defense is to tell the jury they are wrong.

A man sues his father for murder; Socrates asks him to define piety. It goes poorly.

The crowd says go one way; the Stoics suggest doing the exact opposite.

A sensitive young artist falls for a woman who is already engaged, then sends a lot of very long letters.

A Trojan prince falls for a defector's daughter, only for a prisoner swap to test if love outlasts a siege.

A man claims he is a master of poetry. Socrates suggests he is just a magnet.

Four sisters try to be good while dealing with temper, poverty, and an overly imaginative neighbor.

A Roman advisor writes to his friends about keeping calm when everything is actively falling apart.

The wealthy are hypocrites, the poor are desperate, and everyone is under constant judgment.

A princess dances for her stepfather, demanding the head of a prophet on a platter.

Two ancient tablets surface, and a pair of academics spend decades arguing about the translation.

A man tries to explain his life and spends four volumes on his conception instead.

A man obsessed with sorcery accidentally transforms into a donkey. Staying that way is harder.

Two men leave the city walls to critique a speech about romance and rhetoric.

A Jewish prince seeks vengeance against Rome, only to find a bigger revolution in Bethlehem.

Socrates teaches estate management, proving that keeping your pantry orderly is basically a military operation.

Two best friends move to Milan, where one immediately decides to steal the other's girlfriend.

Three men walk to a cave and invent an entire government on the way.

A nurse swaps two babies in their cribs; twenty years later, the wrong boy inherits everything.

A young man loses his fortune, his uncle turns predator, and the world is predictably awful.

Two schoolmates navigate a world of debt, social climbing, and war where everyone has a price and no one is satisfied.

A man walks the streets while his wife stays in bed and a poet loses his mind.

A father sells his last silver to fund his daughters' diamonds while a law student learns that social climbing requires blood.

A lecherous father is murdered, his sons are the only suspects, and the soul of Russia hangs in the balance.

A boy survives Jesuit discipline, a terrifying vision of hell, and his father's bankruptcy to invent himself as an artist.

An American girl ignores every European rule, and the locals have a collective meltdown.

A wealthy patriarch tests his family by pretending to be senile while his grandson tries to survive an American swamp.

A hungry orphan asks for more gruel, flees to London, and accidentally joins a charmingly professional circle of pickpockets.

A fifty-year-old novelist goes on vacation and decides that following a teenager is his new job.

The courts debate a fortune for generations while everyone involved turns to dust.

A boy gets sent away, works in a bottle factory, and grows up eventually.

A debt-ridden Kentuckian sells his best man and a toddler, triggering a desperate flight across ice and a descent downriver.

A man sails up a river to find a trader. He finds silence.

An officer breaks hearts, starts duels, and wonders why he cannot be happy.

A resourceful boy survives a series of terrible masters through petty theft, clever lies, and the occasional flying leap.

An aging gentleman decides the world needs more dragons and fewer windmills. This ends poorly.

A family treats marriage as an acquisition, until the ledger starts losing money.

A wealthy merchant wants an heir, ignores his daughter, and learns that cold accounts don't keep you warm.

Born in Newgate, she survives five husbands, one accidental brother, and twelve years of professional thievery to die a wealthy penitent.

A husband auctions his family for five guineas. Eighteen years later, the bill finally comes due.

Wives, mothers, and widows find themselves in rooms they can no longer comfortably occupy.

Clarissa plans a party while a stranger's life unravels just blocks away.

A man builds a mansion to win a girl. She is already home.

A young man learns that his tutor’s philosophy of optimism is basically a death trap.

Expatriates drink through Paris and Pamplona while a war-wounded veteran watches the woman he loves chase a teenage bullfighter.

The Compson family legacy is collapsing, and nobody can agree on what time it actually is.

A stage play turns its readers into walking disasters. The city is just collateral damage.

Two captains and a boat crew head west with trade beads, flannel shirts, and a very detailed diary habit.

A murderer mocks the law, a chess player faces a ghostly rival, and the dead refuse to remain quiet at evening.

King Rinkitink loves jokes, his goat loves sarcasm, and their island just lost its entire population.

A young naturalist boards a survey ship for five years, encountering jaguars, glaciers, and severe seasickness.

From murderous cats to phantom toes, twenty-five accounts of the supernatural range from the psychological to the suspiciously culinary.

A man inherits a box of clippings and discovers the stars are finally aligning for a giant, gelatinous apocalypse.

An antiquarian’s curiosity proves hazardous as long-dead monks, cursed ash trees, and forgotten whistles unleash specific, physical, and very angry spirits.

An American skeptic travels through the Holy Land, mocking overly enthusiastic pilgrims, dishonest guides, and the general lack of soap.

A prince attempts to outrun a fatal pandemic by welding his doors shut and throwing a very expensive party.

A century of tragedy in a cellar, until the narrator brings a carboy of acid.

Two amateur sailors find a German invasion fleet lurking in the shallows of the North Sea.

An invisible predator stalks the wilderness, but the jury is only interested in your sanity.

A collection of sleuths, secrets, and enough missing pages to fill a police report.

Two vagabonds claim a kingdom, a traveler finds a village of the dead, and the colonial heat breeds restless ghosts.

A governess protects two beautiful children from ghosts only she can see, until her protection becomes their greatest danger.

An old soldier brings a mummified paw to tea, turning a modest mortgage payment into a domestic horror story.

A boy grows up in a shadow of secrets, chasing a treasure that promises only ruin.

Telepathy and horse racing collide; it turns out human nature is still just as messy as ever.

Two people tour England by car, argue about honor, and slowly realize they are the only ones not lying.

An old friend visits a crumbling estate where the architecture is as unstable as the family’s sanity.

A law student, a secretary, and several medical students encounter spectral visitors in isolated cabins and drafty city rentals.

A Fleet Street barber offers a very close shave while his neighbor sells the most popular, mysterious pies in London.

A man returns to a rotting village to save his partner from a basement-dwelling horror.

Professional men encounter things that shouldn't exist, and things that certainly do.

A collection of grim maritime encounters where treasure usually comes with a side of betrayal and a sharp dirk knife.

A prince kneels, a hermit chats with ospreys, and the frost paints pictures on a bedroom window.

A young doctor takes a quiet summer job only to find a missing predecessor and a creature with steel claws.

A man wanders his garden, stares at his reflection, and finds ghosts in the furniture.

A scientific expedition to Antarctica discovers that the continent’s original inhabitants are not extinct, just very, very irritable.

A man tries to outrun his own marriage, but Ann Whitefield is a very persistent guardian.

An undercover detective infiltrates a cabal of anarchists, only to find the revolution is surprisingly bureaucratic.

A king, a judge, and a ghost walk into a sixteenth-century tragedy.

A knight prepares for the Crusades, but first he has to finish his cigarette commercial.

Uncle Peter cleans up the local mob by turning gangsters into dust, confusing everyone.

Four strangers get stuck in an elevator and end up as someone's oversized present.

Two newlyweds take a gap year, except it is in space and they are fighting Martians.

A professor deciphers a runic note, ignores all safety protocols, and takes his nephew to the Earth's core.

A stranded chemist makes a friend on Mars. His friend is a bird-thing that talks in whistles.

An Arizona prospector wakes up on Mars, discovers he has superpowers, and joins a six-limbed green warrior tribe.